As Christmas approaches with all the subtlety of a taxi driver discussing immigration, most of us will be scrambling around the house for a pen and a piece of paper on which to write a shopping list.
For some, it’s the only time of year a list is written. Yet for others, the list is a weekly, or even daily, necessity. A fortnight back, I liberated this list from the basket of an old lady:
Two lavender air fresheners? Just what are you masking?
Only joking. I took it from her handbag. It is, without doubt, gloriously Scottish. Then on Tuesday in Lidl, I found this rather more disturbing exhibit:
Lidl by Lidl
Either ‘SLEEP AID’ (clearly vital; it’s circled) is a euphemism for booze, or this is a recipe for poison. That’s fair enough, but as for the apostrophe on ‘onions’…
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